Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

How can I miss you if you won’t go away?

Sarcastic Quote: How can I miss you if you...

Submitted by: prplraines on October 6, 2011
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Do I know Sarcasm? Why yes he’s my best friend…

Sarcastic Quote: Do I know Sarcasm? Why yes he’s...

Submitted by: 'Lil miss giggle on August 22, 2008
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You: Go to hell.
Me: I go on vacations there.

Sarcastic Quote: You: Go to hell. Me: I go...

Submitted by: Vuyie on March 23, 2013
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3 A.M. Phone call… Hey are you asleep?… No I’m sky diving!

Sarcastic Quote: 3 A.M. Phone call… Hey are you...

Submitted by: Dannie on September 21, 2010
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Last time I checked I didn’t ask for your opinion.

Sarcastic Quote: Last time I checked I didn’t ask...

Submitted by: chirs on December 3, 2011
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It’s not that they’re ugly. It’s just that everybody else is better looking.

Sarcastic Quote: It’s not that they’re ugly. It’s just...

Submitted by: David S on April 14, 2010
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There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.

Sarcastic Quote: There’s a fine like between being tanned,...

Submitted by: MCMLXXXVII on May 25, 2011
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Well, thank you. Coming from you, it means…absolutely nothing.

Sarcastic Quote: Well, thank you. Coming from you, it...

Submitted by: Unknown on March 29, 2012
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Nice shoes, how long did the doctor say you had to were them?

Sarcastic Quote: Nice shoes, how long did the doctor...

Submitted by: Jim on September 4, 2010
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One second…oh okay found it… Here is my cellphone, call someone who cares…

Sarcastic Quote: One second…oh okay found it… Here is...

Submitted by: ThisOnesFunny on January 30, 2010
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I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done making this device that lets you punch people in the face over the Internet!

Sarcastic Quote: I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done...

Submitted by: kyliek on November 2, 2011
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Tell me what gave you the impression that I actually care, so I can avoid it next time.

Sarcastic Quote: Tell me what gave you the impression...

Submitted by: N413z on April 12, 2010
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Man, I sure do hate a bag of air with chips in it.

Sarcastic Quote: Man, I sure do hate a bag...

Submitted by: Iamunknown on April 11, 2013
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I don’t know what you’re problem is. . . But I’m pretty sure it’s hard to pronounce.

Sarcastic Quote: I don’t know what you’re problem is....

Submitted by: Lex on September 10, 2010
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It’s your lie…tell it however you want!

Sarcastic Quote: It’s your lie…tell it however you want!

Submitted by: Angie Bryant on October 13, 2010
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B*tch at least I still remember planetary motion. The world revolves around the sun.

Sarcastic Quote: B*tch at least I still remember planetary...

Submitted by: derek dsemre on January 5, 2013
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Oh, you deleted me on Facebook. Is that your final revenge? What’s next… You throw a fruit loop at the back of

my head and expect it to hurt?
Sarcastic Quote: Oh, you deleted me on Facebook. Is...

Submitted by: Liz G on January 2, 2012
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How could I possibly refuse? No thank you.

Sarcastic Quote: How could I possibly refuse? No thank...

Submitted by: Marlin on April 8, 2009
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Don’t worry you’re not as dumb as you look.

Sarcastic Quote: Don’t worry you’re not as dumb as...

Submitted by: chyenne on November 27, 2009
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Sarcasm is just another free service I offer. No refunds.

Sarcastic Quote: Sarcasm is just another free service I...

Submitted by: Brighton on February 28, 2011
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The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out of 10 doctors would prescribe.

Sarcastic Quote: The only thing to fear is fear...

Submitted by: shawnn on June 8, 2013
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Sorry, my fist meant to caress your face.

Sarcastic Quote: Sorry, my fist meant to caress your...

Submitted by: Iamunknown on March 27, 2013
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How very observant of you there captain obvious.

Sarcastic Quote: How very observant of you there captain...

Submitted by: Lima Tiapula on March 10, 2013
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Just because people don’t understand you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

Sarcastic Quote: Just because people don’t understand you doesn’t...

Submitted by: livelaff on October 24, 2011
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I’m not sleeping, I’m just checking my eyelids for holes!

Sarcastic Quote: I’m not sleeping, I’m just checking my...

Submitted by: kyliek on November 2, 2011
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You must be really clever to act so stupid all the time.

Sarcastic Quote: You must be really clever to act...

Submitted by: Snailman on December 12, 2011
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Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).

Sarcastic Quote: Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish...

Submitted by: sarcasm on December 19, 2011
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I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx

Sarcastic Quote: I find television very educating. Every time...

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Don’t be so humble – you are not that great.
– Golda Meir

Sarcastic Quote: Don’t be so humble – you are...

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Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
Ashleigh Brilliant

Sarcastic Quote: Sometimes I need what only you can...

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