Sex Quotes and Sayings

You’re 12, you should be loosing teeth. Not your virginity.

Chinese: Me not come to work, me sick. Boss: When I’m sick I have sex with my wife, try it. Later Chinese called back: It worked. Me better. You got nice house!

If you’re born in September, it’s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a “Bang”.

They say you shouldn’t lie to your doctor. But admit it, if they ask if you’ve ever had sex, and your mom is right there, you’re gonna say no.

Men use love to get sex. Women use sex to get love. Me? I use coupons to get pizza.


Safe sex is great sex, better wear a latex cos you don’t want that late text… that I think I’m late text.

If you’re man enough to knock her up…then, you better be man enough to support the child.

All men approve of premarital sex…until they have a daughter.

My sex life is like a Ferrari…I don’t have a Ferrari.

Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.
– Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at.
– Jimmy Demaret


Since sex got easier to get. Love got harder to find.

The nicer you treat her outside the bedroom, the naughtier it will get inside the bedroom.

Dirty: Not all sex is great. It certainly has its’ ups and downs.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson

Love is the cure to all diseases but sex is the only cure to a broken heart.

Submitted by: Virgz de bylz

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