Person 1: Are you watching TV on the couch? Person 2: No, I’m sitting on the TV and watching the couch.
My parents told me “You watch too much TV and should try reading more!” So I turned on the subtitles.
If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark.
That awkward moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. – Groucho Marx
Never trust anyone whose TV is bigger than their book shelf. – Emilia Clarke
When your favorite TV show is on and you can’t find the remote.
Once upon a time, every person on earth were extremely intelligent, then the TV was invented.
That frustrating moment when every TV channel is on a commercial break.
Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV. – Jerry Seinfeld
If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there’d be peace. – John Lennon
Television is not real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. – Bill Gates
TV has made dictatorship impossible, but democracy unbearable. – Shimon Peres
I never thought television would or could be a long- term commitment. – Jimmy Smits
Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television? – Henny Youngman
In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn’t danced on television. – Erma Bombeck
Chuck Norris doesn’t watch TV, TV watches Chuck Norris.
There are now more TV’s in British households than there are people – which is a bit of a worry. – Prince Charles
Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it. – Alfred Hitchcock
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. – Erma Bombeck
If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you’re not considered well viewed. – Lily Tomlin
Television is a new medium. It’s called a medium because nothing is well-done. – Fred Allen
I will never understand why they cook on TV. I can’t smell it, can’t eat it, can’t taste it. The end of the show they hold it up to the camera: “Well, here it is. You can’t have any. Goodbye.” – Jerry Seinfeld
Ninety-eight percent of American homes have TV sets, which means the people in the other 2% have to generate their own sex and violence. – George Baylos
Television is an anesthetic for the pain of the modern world. – Astrid Alauda
Television is chewing gum for the eyes. – Frank Lloyd Wright
Remote controls are quite handy. They let you see that there’s nothing worth watching on TV a lot faster. – Melanie White
All television is educational television. The question is: what is it teaching? – Nicholas Johnson
Time has convinced me of one thing. Television is for appearing on, not looking at. – Noel Coward
Television is the triumph of machine over people. – Fred Allen
Television – the drug of the nation. Breeding ignorance and feeding radiation…
Television keeps the masses occupied. What if everyone decided they wanted to make something of their lives? Television keeps the competition down and keeps more criminals off the street. What if everyone decided to go to law school or medical school? It would sure make it tough on the rest of us. – Jim Urbanovich
So, please, oh please, we beg, we pray, go throw your TV set away, and in its place you can install, a lovely bookcase on the wall. – Roald Dahl
I think it’s brought the world a lot closer together, and will continue to do that. There are downsides to everything; there are unintended consequences to everything. The most corrosive piece of technology that I’ve ever seen is called television – but then, again, television, at its best, is magnificent. – Steve Jobs
We deal with all varieties of information. Somebody’s always upset no matter what we do. We have to make a decision; otherwise there’s a never-ending debate. – Sergey Brin
If we could follow the slogan that says,”Turn off the TV and open a good book” we would do something of substance for a future generation. – Gordon B. Hinckley
I have never seen a bad television program, because I refuse to. God gave me a mind, and a wrist that turns things off. – Jack Paar
Chilling out on the bed in your hotel room watching television, while wearing your own pajamas, is sometimes the best part of a vacation. – Laura Marano
Imitation is the sincerest form of television. – Fred Allen
A lot of TV is put together by teams, by writing staffs and several different directors. It’s a great, very smart way to make television. It’s worked for however long TV’s been around. – Louis C.K.
Reality TV is set up to make people entertaining. A good person with values and principles is not good television. – Ronda Rousey
Television has raised writing to a new low. – Samuel Goldwyn
Television is simply automated day-dreaming. – Lee Lovinger
If TV were only an invention to broadcast soccer, it would be justified. – Roberto Fontanarrosa
On Friday night, I was reading my new book, but my brain got tired, so I decided to watch some television instead. – Stephen Chbosky
Thanks to TV and for the convenience of TV, you can only be one of two kinds of human beings, either a liberal or a conservative. – Kurt Vonnegut
I think you might dispense with half your doctors if you would only consult Dr. Sun more. – Henry Ward Beecher
Today, watching television often means fighting, violence and foul language – and that’s just deciding who gets to hold the remote control. – Donna Gephart
Don’t you wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There’s one marked ‘Brightness,’ but it doesn’t work. – Gallagher
I hate television. I hate it as much as I hate peanuts. But I can’t stop eating peanuts. – Orson Welles
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