I’m not opinionated. I’m just always right.
Top 10 reasons I procrastinate: 10.
If life gives you lemons. Eat carrots.
I don’t judge God does. I’m the one who makes your appointment.
I used to get lost in the shuffle, but now I just shuffle along with the lost.
When you have wit of your own, it’s a pleasure to credit other people for theirs. – Criss Jami
Understanding the single-line quote is like comprehending the bulky book with its title only and correctly. – Anuj Somany
Teacher: What do you wish to do with your future? Me: Stay alive until the day I die.
The first sign of madness is: hairs on the palms of your hands. The second sign is: looking for them.
I used to think that money was the root of all evil until I wanted to commit a robbery when I was broke.
Optimism has no inhibitions based on past experience.
A man mixed with a cat will improve the man, but deteriorate the cat.
I used to be apathetic. Now, I just don’t care anymore.
I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one. – Steven Wright
Nothing but the future lies ahead.
If my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.
Note to self: Don’t forget to write that note to yourself.
A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. – Groucho Marx
Asked the cause of my injury, I explained: “My back couldn’t bear the weight of my stupidity.” – Alan Robert Neal
There is no such thing as lousy weather. Just lousy clothing.
Copyright © 2006-2024 - Browse Quotes By Subject | Browse Quotes By Author | About Us | Blog | FAQ | Privacy Policy
