Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings

Work is for people who don’t know how to play golf.

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
– Tiger Woods

I don’t want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.
– Rogers Hornsby

My most consistent and reliable shot is always the double at the 19th.

Submitted by: Hamilton lloyd

You always know a bad golfer’s name. He’s always cursing at himself.

Submitted by: lau
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I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.
– Buddy Hackett

Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
– Jim Bishop

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
– Billy Graham

I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone’s golf game. It’s called an eraser.
– Arnold Palmer

If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
– Jack Lemmon

Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
– Harry Vardon

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The size of the divot is directly proportional to the frustration felt.

Submitted by: Alastiair

The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.
– Ben Hogan

Early to bed, early to rise, golf all day & make up lies.

Submitted by: Cheryl Erickson

I now consistently hit the fairways by aiming for the trees on both sides of the fairway.

Submitted by: Hamilton Lloyd

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