Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
- P.J. O’Rourke
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
- Hank Aaron
You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex- wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
- Lee Trevino
If I had cleared the trees and drove the green, it would’ve been a great shot.
- Sam Snead
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
- Bob Hope
I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
- Ben Hogan
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can’t play it.
- Ted Ray
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
- Phyllis Diller
The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.
- Ben Hogan
I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.
- Buddy Hackett
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
- Lee Trevino
Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
- Harry Vardon
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie.
- George Deukmejian
Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf… And you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf.
- Jack Benny
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
- Jim Bishop
I’m the best. I just haven’t played yet.
- Muhammad Ali (When asked about his Golf game)
Golf is a game in which you yell “fore,” shoot six, and write down five.
- Paul Harvey
I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.
- G. K. Chesterton
If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
- Jack Lemmon
I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone’s golf game. It’s called an eraser.
- Arnold Palmer