Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings
Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
– Harry Vardon
The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.
– Ben Hogan
Early to bed, early to rise, golf all day & make up lies.
The size of the divot is directly proportional to the frustration felt.
Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf… And you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf.
– Jack Benny
I now consistently hit the fairways by aiming for the trees on both sides of the fairway.
He ain’t no tiger… He’s a cheetah.
For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
– Dave Barry
I’d rather have my worst day on the golf course, than my best day at work.
Golf was invented by wives to get their husbands out of the house on cleaning day.
To golf or not to golf?? What a stupid question!
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can’t play it.
– Ted Ray
Golf is horrifying, humiliating, and humbling, but I can’t wait to do it again.
It says something about the stupidity of a game where the lowest negative score wins.
They named it GOLF because all the other Four- Letter words were taken.
His swing looks like he’s fighting off a swarm of bees
His putting stroke looks like he is trying to kick- start a Harley.
I don’t like your golf tips. I just came here to get flustered in order to cut on my weight.
The difference between a great golfer and an average golfer is not that a great golfer is incapable of hitting a poor shot, it is what he does after that shot.
Golf, a sport for the poor admired by the rich.
That ball rolled like a dead rat in a corn field.