Funny Men Quotes and Sayings

If at first you don’t succeed then you are probably a man.

Submitted by: alayna

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
– Gloria Steinem

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
– Tim Allen

If you never want to see a man again, say, ‘I love you, I want to marry you. I want to have children…’ – they leave skid marks.

A genius is a man who can rewrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over.
– Dino Levi

When a woman wants a man’s opinion…She gives it to him.

Submitted by: carrie

A man – if he has all the good qualities of a MAN can be considered as one of THE WONDERS OF THE WORLD…

Submitted by: NIKILA

A women needs a man like fish need a bicycle.

Submitted by: Sonia

They all say they’re different but really they’re all just the same – boys.

Submitted by: alexlouise

I like my men like I like my coffee. Tied up in a burlap bag and dragged through mountains.


I’m a guy. Since when do we get anything right the first time?
Will Smith

Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.

Women don’t make fools of men most of them are the “do- it- yourself” types.

Men would rather buy you a drink than give you the hard cash to go help yourself.

Submitted by: John Kalumbu

A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.
– Lana Turner

We can train a monkey to fly a jet but we can’t train a man to be humble.

Submitted by: C Ray

To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior’.
Rita Rudner

Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman.
– Maryon Pearson

The man is not a dog – he will not run after bones.

Submitted by: mareniek

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Groucho Marx

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