Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

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Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.
Steven Wright

Submitted by: Jinny

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.

Sarcastic Quote: Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they...

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Submitted by: =)=)=)=)

Silence is golden.
duct tape is silver.

Submitted by: tiaa.

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.

Submitted by: Maximum_Ride_Beth

People say that laughter is the best medicine…
your face must be curing the world!

Submitted by: sarcasticness

I don’t believe in plastic surgery,
But in your case,
Go ahead.

Sarcastic Quote: I don’t believe in plastic surgery, But...

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Submitted by: Bubbles

Violence won’t solve anything…But it sure makes me feel good.

Submitted by: Shawnelly

You go girl! And don’t come back.

Submitted by: Hanni

That is the ugliest top Ive ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly.

Submitted by: Robina

Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity.

Submitted by: katsumi

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

Submitted by: Franzeska

I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.

Submitted by: jia-di

Well my imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems

Submitted by: hachi"s girl

I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.
“Don’t make me hit you again!”
“You’re going to hit me again? No, don’t do that! I might not survive!”
Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?
I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.
“I’d insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn’t understand and if I tried to explain it to you, your brain might implode from information overload.”

Submitted by: Carina Aly Ceara

If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, its because you’re both heading in the same direction.

Submitted by: Rhyza

Jealously is a disease…get well soon!!!!

Submitted by: steph

Police pulls over a speeding car ;
COP: I’ve been waiting for you all day.
DRIVER: Yeah well I got here as fast as I could.

Submitted by: levannah

Boy: “You’re not my type.”
Girl: “Why, cause I can read??”

Submitted by: Rhia

Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.

Submitted by: PlayMisty4Me

I’m not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane…

Submitted by: thwhitewolff

Sure I’ll help you out…the same way you came in.

Submitted by: Chantel

Oh… I didn’t tell you… Then It must be none of your business.

Submitted by: J smith

You’d be in good shape…if you ran as much as your mouth.

Submitted by: Emily

You: Go to Hell!
Me: See you there.

Submitted by: Jen

Teacher: We are going to play the quiet game.
Student: Are you playing too?

Submitted by: therandomone

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