Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 13
Mom: *knocks on my door*
Mom: Are you in there?
Me: No, I went to Narnia.
Cop pulls over a car:
Cop:Do you know why I pulled you over?
Driver: You thought I had donuts?
About once a year somebody will ask me “Where is the ice?”
I reply “Check the oven”.
I was stopped by a policeman and his over excited sniffer dog the other day, my dog says you are on drugs, he said…
I said, I’m not the one with a talking dog mate.
No, you don’t have to repeat yourself, … I was ignoring you the first time.
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.
Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
Person 1: You are so cool!
Person 2: Thank you! You’re not so hot yourself.
So did you choose today to humiliate yourself in public?