Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 4
Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.
Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.
Person 1: You are so cool!
Person 2: Thank you! You’re not so hot yourself.
Person 1: You look great !
Person 2: Sorry ! I can’t say the same about you.
Person 1: Just do like me … Lie !
Your just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
SSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH! I smell something
After being cut off mid sentence:
I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you everyday!
I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.
I was stopped by a policeman and his over excited sniffer dog the other day, my dog says you are on drugs, he said…
I said, I’m not the one with a talking dog mate.
You: I’m going to be a comedian one day!
Me: *Bursts into fits of giggles*
You: Whats so funny?
Me: *gasps* oh! you were being serious, i’m sorry.
I thought I had seen the pinnacle of stupid… Then I met you.
Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.
Never judge a book by its cover but always by it’s price tag.
If you want to throw your attitude I will be waiting with a baseball bat.
At times the way you choose to ignore me, I feel God is still with me.
Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.
About once a year somebody will ask me “Where is the ice?”
I reply “Check the oven”.
Don’t be humble. You’re not that great.
- Golda Meir
Well, thank you. Coming from you, it means…absolutely nothing.
It’s not that they’re ugly. It’s just that everybody else is better looking.
I’m not good at giving advice…how about sarcasm?
Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.
oh no … Keep talking … I always YAWN when I’m interested…:)
You’re right, violence is not the solution; it’s just part of the equation.
A girl wearing pointed high- heeled shoes steps on someones feet
Girl: Sorry, did that hurt?
Someone: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia why don’t you try again.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?