Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5

15

Yes I missed you, but if you come closer my aim is about to get better.
OMG, Did you feel that.. I think the world just revolved around me.. I guess you were wrong.

Submitted by: Laulaus
7

How can I miss you if you won’t go away?

Submitted by: prplraines
18

You’re so cheap.
Yeah! & still you can’t afford me!

Submitted by: Vipul
12

If I had a dollar for every smart thing you said…wait no, then I’d be in debt!

Submitted by: SarcasticSarcasm=Me
9

You: I don’t understand this.
Me: Do you want me to bring a ladder?
You: A ladder for what?
Me: So you can step up to my intelligence level.

Submitted by: Jared
16

DAD… What do you want to be when you grow up?
KID… An adult.

Submitted by: Amba Marie
19

Guy: Hey don’t worry I can play dumb
Woman: Play dumb? You could manage the team!

Submitted by: Nigel Stone
19

Person1- “Dude, you have a serious problem with sarcasm!!!”
Person2- “NO I DON’T… We talk every day!”

Submitted by: nelson
24

Of course I’m NOT being sarcastic!

Submitted by: Boojan_0009
13

It’s always the last place you look for it… Of course it is! Why would you keep looking if you found it?
I’m not so good at advice; may I interest you in a sarcastic reply?

Submitted by: imaqt
8

Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?

Submitted by: jjsnage
11

Being hated and ignored by many, makes my life a lot more easier to handle.

Submitted by: Sigmund
14

No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.

Submitted by: roya
9

You: Go to hell!
Me: See you there (:
You: God. You’re so stupid!
Me: I learned from the best.

Submitted by: Terethatsslifebro
8

Okay…Tell me and I’ll pretend to care.

Submitted by: ikromi
7

I let you know when I start to care….Check back in about five years.

Submitted by: apatheticinatl77
7

Cashier: Hi can I help you?
Me: No I just stood in line for 10 minutes to say hi.

Submitted by: jekah
22

Her face makes me wanna learning boxing.

Submitted by: lena
10

1st Person: I totally hate you!!
2nd Person: And I totally care!!

Submitted by: marieaa ;)
15

You call this fat? I call this a 1 Pack!

Submitted by: Hunter
26

Your new hairstyle is truly amazing. Tell me who did it, and I’ll make them an offer they can’t refuse.

Submitted by: isambard kingdom brownowl
17

You might appear to be hard on people, but I know that deep inside there beats a heart of solid concrete.

Submitted by: isambard kingdom brownowl
17

Would you care to join me?
Why, are you coming apart?

Submitted by: isambard kingdom brownowl
15

Early to bed early to rise just means you didn’t get invited to the party.

Submitted by: aj
8

After being cut off mid sentence:
I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Submitted by: CJ
15

Oh, I’m sorry. Were you under the impression that I value your opinion?

Submitted by: Everybodyhatesmeh
11

A: I hate ugly things.
B: So I’m sure that you hate mirrors.

Submitted by: Roojole
14

You are about as useful as a white crayon.

Submitted by: James
15

Wow, it was nice meeting you!
And if I ever see you again, it’ll be too soon.

Submitted by: prakash
35

Would you like a side of epic with that fail?
You- Thank you Captain Obvious!
Me- You’re welcome Lieutenant Sarcasm!!

Submitted by: Kelsey

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