Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5
You’re right, violence is not the solution; it’s just part of the equation.
Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
“Are you sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”
A girl wearing pointed high- heeled shoes steps on someones feet
Girl: Sorry, did that hurt?
Someone: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia why don’t you try again.
The movie was awesome!! My favorite part was when it ended.
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
You: Did I wake you up?
Me: Nah I’m always awake at 3 am!
*Me washing my car*
Person: Hey what’s up? Washing your car?
Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, and the highest form of intelligence.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?
If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.
- Victor Borge
Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
If you’re too open- minded, your brains will fall out.
- Lawrence Ferlinghetti
We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.
I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.
Text : Hey, you up??!!
Text response: Nope, just fell asleep an hour ago. . .
The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.
You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.
Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…
Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?
WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.