Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5

9

You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.

Submitted by: nyanaya
38

WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.

Submitted by: jo-c
4

Person 1 : Was my speech good?
Person 2 : Yup but I couldn’t understand a word you were saying.

Submitted by: Xuan
7

The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.

50

Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.

Submitted by: mewntx
158

Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…

Submitted by: Stefana
85

Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?

Submitted by: magda
237

You: Go to Hell!
Me: See you there.

Submitted by: Jen
13

You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.

Submitted by: aastha
3

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

7

Shut up, will you?” “Oh, I’m sorry, Your Highness, should I go get you your coffee and tea now?

127

You have no one to blame but yourself…Unless some other guy is standing next to you then you can blame him.

Submitted by: prankcaller911
4

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
– Stephen Bishop

31

Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.

Submitted by: kate
19

My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.

Submitted by: dave title
15

If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.

Submitted by: derek dsemre
64

“I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
“It’s in the phone book.”
“But I don’t know your name.”
“That’s in the phone book too.”
You’re so cool.
Any cooler and you would be me.

Submitted by: mandy
108

Here let me drop whats imprortant to me and pay attention to you and all of your needs.

Submitted by: lisa
61

Are you really stupid or you are just pretending?

Submitted by: bmt
8

Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?

Submitted by: jjsnage
8

Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt.
– Cassandra Clare

219

You: “Why are you here?”
Me: “Well… Heaven didn’t want me,
And hells afraid I’ll take over.”

Submitted by: Kikkaa
7

Police pulls over a speeding car:
Cop: Mam, do you know why am I standing here?
Driver: Cause you got all D’s in high school?

Submitted by: Peter
17

Person: Go to hell
You: As long as you won’t be there

Submitted by: Kaya
4

I’m impressed, I’ve never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.

8

A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility.
– Lawrence G. Lovasik

54

Don’t argue with fools, cos people from a distance can’t tell which one is you.

Submitted by: J-rock
15

Sarcasm is just another free service I offer. No refunds.

Submitted by: Brighton
4

Sarcasm I now see to be, in general, the language of the Devil; for which reason I have, long since, as good as renounced it.
– Thomas Carlyle

264

Think I am sarcastic?
Watch me pretend to care!

Submitted by: Noem Miranda

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