Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?
“Are you sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”
The movie was awesome!! My favorite part was when it ended.
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.
*Me washing my car*
Person: Hey what’s up? Washing your car?
Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
You: Did I wake you up?
Me: Nah I’m always awake at 3 am!
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, and the highest form of intelligence.
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.
If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.
- Victor Borge
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
Text : Hey, you up??!!
Text response: Nope, just fell asleep an hour ago. . .
I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.
Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.
Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
If you’re too open- minded, your brains will fall out.
- Lawrence Ferlinghetti
We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
A: I hate ugly things.
B: So I’m sure that you hate mirrors.
Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.
Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…
WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.