Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5
A girl wearing pointed high- heeled shoes steps on someones feet
Girl: Sorry, did that hurt?
Someone: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia why don’t you try again.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?
“Are you sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
The movie was awesome!! My favorite part was when it ended.
Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
You: Did I wake you up?
Me: Nah I’m always awake at 3 am!
You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, and the highest form of intelligence.
If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.
- Victor Borge
Text : Hey, you up??!!
Text response: Nope, just fell asleep an hour ago. . .
I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.
Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.
We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
If you’re too open- minded, your brains will fall out.
- Lawrence Ferlinghetti
A: I hate ugly things.
B: So I’m sure that you hate mirrors.
The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.
Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…
WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?