Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 5
oh no … Keep talking … I always YAWN when I’m interested…:)
Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.
A: I hate ugly things.
B: So I’m sure that you hate mirrors.
A girl wearing pointed high- heeled shoes steps on someones feet
Girl: Sorry, did that hurt?
Someone: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia why don’t you try again.
Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.
You: I don’t understand this.
Me: Do you want me to bring a ladder?
You: A ladder for what?
Me: So you can step up to my intelligence level.
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
You: Did I wake you up?
Me: Nah I’m always awake at 3 am!
Text : Hey, you up??!!
Text response: Nope, just fell asleep an hour ago. . .
Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.
The movie was awesome!! My favorite part was when it ended.
If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever
We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
Police pulls over a speeding car:
Cop: Mam, do you know why am I standing here?
Driver: Cause you got all D’s in high school?
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, and the highest form of intelligence.
Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal
I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.
WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
– Stephen Bishop
“Are you sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”