Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 6
Why are you late? The teacher asked…
I guess its because I didn’t make it in time…replied the student
Should I bring ladder so you can step out of my business?
Nice shoes, how long did the doctor say you had to were them?
Sarcasm is the secret language that everyone uses when they want to say something mean to your face.
Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.
Girl 1: Do you like my new dress?
Girl 2: Yeah, I like it… Are you wearing it for Halloween? :)
Sales Clerk: Sir are you going to buy that?
Person: No, I’m just shop lifting it all the way to the cash register…
You: “Are you kidding me?”
Me: “Yes, I’m serious”
Me- “What time is it?”
You- “There’s a clock right there.”
Me- “Did I ask you where the clock was!?”
Well aren’t you a breath of fresh air!
Tell me how I have upset you, because I want to know how to do it again.
I’m not good at giving advice…how about sarcasm?
I miss him like I miss a sore thumb.
Mom: Is that cake delicious?
You: MMMMM… No, it’s awful, that’s why I’m eating it.
If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a stupid question.
Text : Hey, you up??!!
Text response: Nope, just fell asleep an hour ago. . .
So are you single?…- For you? No.
Nice top do they make them for guys?( obviously this must be asked to a guy)
(When bumping into someone you hate and haven’t seen for a while)…Five more minutes and I would have started missing you.
..statement – I am at College/ I was accepted in College…response- Oh good for you. So is it to study or to be studied?
I hear voices and even they don’t like you.!
Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.
Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.
You’re so beautiful and blooming today..Happy Halloween !
Person 1: Are you sleeping?
Person 2: Oh yes, I’m always having conversations in my sleep…
Somebody: So you think you’re some kind of player?
You: No. I know I’m the Game!
Woman 1 – Do you like my new jeans?
Woman 2 – wow yes… Do they come in women sizes?
‘A’ is reading a book, ‘B’ says …
B: “Are you reading?”
A: “No, I’m staring at the book hoping that lasers will come out of my eyes and burn the book.”
Oh I’m sorry, I’m not really good at acting like I care!
Person 1: Can I ask you a question?
Person 2: You just did!
Congratulations, If you press the elevator button three times it goes into hurry mode – really…
You: OMG did you just fall.?
Me: No the ground just came up and smacked me in my face.!
Just in case you haven’t noticed, you are ugly both mentally and physically. Other than that? You are totally fine!
We have a love and hate relationship….. He loves me, I hate him.
SSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH! I smell something
I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you everyday!
Oh wow, who cut your hair?… The council?
That sounds so cool! It’s a shame I’m not interested…
You: Do you want a piece of my mind?!
Me: Oh no, I couldn’t take the last piece.
You: Are you sleeping?
Me: I’m not sleeping, I’m just trying to suffocate this bug in my eye… It might take a while.
I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.
Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.
It’s not that they’re ugly. It’s just that everybody else is better looking.