Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings
Not many people can listen to you and survive. I should be getting an award.
Well, thank you. Coming from you, it means…absolutely nothing.
Be my guest and leave.
You’re not stupid; you’re just not that smart.
I’ll give you five seconds to find hell.
– Sweetie, I’m already there (:
It’s okay, my sarcasm fixes your stupidity.
And who told you you were intelligent?????
Police pulls over a speeding car:
Cop: Mam, do you know why am I standing here?
Driver: Cause you got all D’s in high school?
Awkward moment – When your sarcasm is so advanced it makes you look stupid.
I’m sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.
3 o’clock in the morning and your best friend calls
You: HEY!! Dude I’m awake and super hyper!!!
You: Dude, are you asleep?
Me: No stupid, I’m skydiving.
Tell me about your problems again. ‘Cause I care SO much about your problems.
Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.
I’m told that familiarity breeds contempt … Well I feel I’ve know you forever.
I’m sorry. I couldn’t see a person behind that giant ego.
I must be psychic. I predicted you’d be an idiot.
Don’t blame yourself. Let me do it.
I failed my spelling test. The teacher said “Idiot” and I put your name down.
You are funny, you make everyone laugh except when you joke.
You think you’re so smart?
– No, I don’t. I’m actually pretty sure.