Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

You – “Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!”
Me – “I’m sorry there’s a correct side to be waking up on?”
It takes patience to listen, however it takes absolute skill to pretend you’re listening.
Excuse me love, would you like a skirt to go with that belt?!

Submitted by: Leah Victoria

Person 1 : Was my speech good?
Person 2 : Yup but I couldn’t understand a word you were saying.

Submitted by: Xuan

My Brother: Since when is silence smart?
Me: Since you started talking…

Submitted by: Bob Longfluffy

9 more hours and I can start behaving normally again.

Submitted by: Patience

Life’s good, you should get one.

Submitted by: TTres

I find it funny…
But I have forgotten how to laugh..
Damn!

Submitted by: Siiana

Person 1: “Does this look like a face of concern?”
Person 2: “It will if I smashed it in.”

Submitted by: some-tea

You- “oh find it funny do you?!”
Me- “hence the laughter”

Submitted by: Leah Victoria

Not many people can listen to you and survive. I should be getting an award.

Submitted by: Bill

Well, thank you. Coming from you, it means…absolutely nothing.

Submitted by: Unknown

Be my guest and leave.
You’re not stupid; you’re just not that smart.

Submitted by: Mia

I’ll give you five seconds to find hell.
– Sweetie, I’m already there (:

Submitted by: Haylee

It’s okay, my sarcasm fixes your stupidity.

Submitted by: Mimia

And who told you you were intelligent?????

Submitted by: gilda

Police pulls over a speeding car:
Cop: Mam, do you know why am I standing here?
Driver: Cause you got all D’s in high school?

Submitted by: Peter

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