Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 8
You are about as useful as a white crayon.
Wow, it was nice meeting you!
And if I ever see you again, it’ll be too soon.
Would you like a side of epic with that fail?
You- Thank you Captain Obvious!
Me- You’re welcome Lieutenant Sarcasm!!
Person 1: Why are you so fat?
Person 2: I’m not fat. I am skinny, it’s just that because of all the fat you can’t see it.
Sarcasm kindles joy in us, releases frustration in a comic way.
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
Person 1: What time is it?
Person 2: Do I look like a clock to you?
John: Do you know there are 24 hours in a day?
Elvine: Really!!! You have a gift John.
Elvine: A gift for stating the obvious.
Q: Are you serious?
A: No I’m bigdaddybob…
Sarcasm is my mother tongue.
I need you like a fish need a rain coat.
Here you go!! It’s a bowl of sarcasm!!
Person 1: Please don’t tell me that …
Person 2: Okay, I won’t tell you that …
I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again.
I never repeat myself.
Sarcasm, Just another service I offer. What do you offer? stupidity?
Languages I speak
I trip and knock over a book shelf.
Random person: “Smooth.”
Me: “Thank you, I try.”
I was stopped by a policeman and his over excited sniffer dog the other day, my dog says you are on drugs, he said…
I said, I’m not the one with a talking dog mate.
Text: You awake???
Reply: No didn’t you know I text in my sleep
Text back: Oh…text me when you’re awake…
5 minutes later…
Text: Are you awake yet?
You’re right, violence is not the solution; it’s just part of the equation.