Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 8

15

Oh, I’m sorry. Were you under the impression that I value your opinion?

Submitted by: Everybodyhatesmeh
20

Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant
7

Person 1: “Does this look like a face of concern?”
Person 2: “It will if I smashed it in.”

Submitted by: some-tea
13

You must be really clever to act so stupid all the time.

Submitted by: Snailman
15

There are two things in life that are infinite:
Human stupidity and and it’s defense- >sarcasm.

Submitted by: mommagunnaknockuOut
19

Last time I checked I didn’t ask for your opinion.

Submitted by: chirs
56

No, I’m not ignoring you…I just lost interest in what you were about to say.

Submitted by: Mass Of Thumbs
214

You’re unique just like everyone else!

Submitted by: Raden
21

There is a fine line between fashion and circus. So where’s the tent?

Submitted by: Alex
11

Me: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
You: Aww
Me: Cause your face is seriously messed up!

Submitted by: Alli
7

You think you’re so smart?
– No, I don’t. I’m actually pretty sure.

Submitted by: funnygirl
16

I’m not sleeping, I’m just checking my eyelids for holes!

Submitted by: kyliek
23

Sarcasm (because punching people in the face is illegal) <3.

Submitted by: Rose
18

Sorry, my fist meant to caress your face.

Submitted by: Iamunknown
18

You’re so cheap.
Yeah! & still you can’t afford me!

Submitted by: Vipul
9

Person 1: Is that you?!
Person 2: Nah, I’m an alien from the planet obvious.

Submitted by: Fred 'n' George
60

3 A.M. Phone call… Hey are you asleep?… No I’m sky diving!

Submitted by: Dannie
9

The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out 10 doctors would prescribe.

Submitted by: julie
28

You’re only jealous cos the voices don’t talk to you.

Submitted by: Shadowfairy1996
12

“Why do you talk to yourself?”
“Cos I like intelligent conversation.”
So what do you want to do?…I dunno
Well that helps a lot
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
Why did you commit such a crime like that? He asked “Would you rather us commit a crime a different way?”

Submitted by: MYA MOORE
8

It’s okay, my sarcasm fixes your stupidity.

Submitted by: Mimia
14

No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.

Submitted by: roya
24

Inside the fitting room:
Me: Hey Miss, it doesn’t fit me, do you have a larger size of this shirt?
Sales Lady: Is it for you Sir?
Me: No, its for the other guy on that room, I am wondering why I am fitting this one, can you get a larger size for him?

Submitted by: Ryan
35

So are you single?…- For you? No.
Nice top do they make them for guys?( obviously this must be asked to a guy)
(When bumping into someone you hate and haven’t seen for a while)…Five more minutes and I would have started missing you.
..statement – I am at College/ I was accepted in College…response- Oh good for you. So is it to study or to be studied?

Submitted by: sarcastiktik Boom
16

DAD… What do you want to be when you grow up?
KID… An adult.

Submitted by: Amba Marie
31

That sounds so cool! It’s a shame I’m not interested…

Submitted by: Sfiesta
7

I find it funny…
But I have forgotten how to laugh..
Damn!

Submitted by: Siiana
19

B*tch at least I still remember planetary motion. The world revolves around the sun.

Submitted by: derek dsemre
14

You’re pretty… See I can be funny too.

Submitted by: faith
20

I’m not really good at giving advice, could I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Submitted by: Hinesey

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