Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 8

10

You: Where Are You Going?
Me: Somewhere You’re Not..

Submitted by: Chris
7

Your silence echos your thoughts.

Submitted by: PeteMitt
41

So did you choose today to humiliate yourself in public?

Submitted by: ohwhatever!
31

Looks are only skin deep but ugly goes right to the bone.

Submitted by: Danielle
155

That’s a pretty dress…too bad you couldn’t find it in your size.

Submitted by: sslewis
6

Time flies by when you’re insulting people.

Submitted by: Sergaveena Mammakova
18

I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done making this device that lets you punch people in the face over the Internet!

Submitted by: kyliek
6

I won’t say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner.We used to write essays like: What I’m going to be if I grow up.
- Lenny Bruce

6

How much do you charge to haunt a house?

Submitted by: thomas geddes
54

Oh… Sorry… Did you mistake me for someone who cares?

Submitted by: Munkichikin
34

Nice shoes, how long did the doctor say you had to were them?

Submitted by: Jim
25

You: “Are you kidding me?”
Me: “Yes, I’m serious”

Submitted by: Kurt
19

Person 1: Wow, I can’t play guitar as good as you do.
Person 2: Really?
Person 1: Yes, no matter how hard I try, I always play it better than you.

Submitted by: whitecat
67

Tact is for people not witty enough to be sarcastic.

Submitted by: Kelley
37

Oh yeah, the louder you yell, the more right you are.
Turn off the lights…you look better that way.

Submitted by: Ishamael
5

Someone said that you didn’t have half a brain, but I defended you, I insisted that you did!

Submitted by: Richard
12

Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.

Submitted by: eeinjhel
39

I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant
22

Teacher asked why are you late?
Student: Because I didn’t come in early.

Submitted by: jennifer
7

Awkward moment – When your sarcasm is so advanced it makes you look stupid.
I’m sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.

Submitted by: Madison
13

There are two things in life that are infinite:
Human stupidity and and it’s defense- >sarcasm.

Submitted by: mommagunnaknockuOut
11

Being hated and ignored by many, makes my life a lot more easier to handle.

Submitted by: Sigmund
30

Tell me what gave you the impression that I actually care, so I can avoid it next time.

Submitted by: N413z
55

Time flies when I’m with you… Well, it’s because I zone out mostly.

Submitted by: Mass Of Thumbs
12

A guy asks “Do you think I’m straight?”
My response: You’re as straight as a circle.

Submitted by: Aj

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