Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 8

5

A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.

12

Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.

Submitted by: eeinjhel
43

So did you choose today to humiliate yourself in public?

Submitted by: ohwhatever!
31

Looks are only skin deep but ugly goes right to the bone.

Submitted by: Danielle
11

I’m sorry. I couldn’t see a person behind that giant ego.
I must be psychic. I predicted you’d be an idiot.
Don’t blame yourself. Let me do it.
I failed my spelling test. The teacher said “Idiot” and I put your name down.

Submitted by: Jessica
155

That’s a pretty dress…too bad you couldn’t find it in your size.

Submitted by: sslewis
6

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
Oscar Wilde

22

Teacher asked why are you late?
Student: Because I didn’t come in early.

Submitted by: jennifer
19

I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done making this device that lets you punch people in the face over the Internet!

Submitted by: kyliek
19

Person 1: Wow, I can’t play guitar as good as you do.
Person 2: Really?
Person 1: Yes, no matter how hard I try, I always play it better than you.

Submitted by: whitecat
12

You: Where Are You Going?
Me: Somewhere You’re Not..

Submitted by: Chris
25

You: “Are you kidding me?”
Me: “Yes, I’m serious”

Submitted by: Kurt
6

I won’t say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner.We used to write essays like: What I’m going to be if I grow up.
– Lenny Bruce

35

Nice shoes, how long did the doctor say you had to were them?

Submitted by: Jim
55

Oh… Sorry… Did you mistake me for someone who cares?

Submitted by: Munkichikin
67

Tact is for people not witty enough to be sarcastic.

Submitted by: Kelley
38

Oh yeah, the louder you yell, the more right you are.
Turn off the lights…you look better that way.

Submitted by: Ishamael
8

Awkward moment – When your sarcasm is so advanced it makes you look stupid.
I’m sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.

Submitted by: Madison
9

Not many people can listen to you and survive. I should be getting an award.

Submitted by: Bill
9

Your silence echos your thoughts.

Submitted by: PeteMitt
9

Someone said that you didn’t have half a brain, but I defended you, I insisted that you did!

Submitted by: Richard
11

Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).

Submitted by: sarcasm
15

Just because people don’t understand you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

Submitted by: livelaff
15

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx

55

Time flies when I’m with you… Well, it’s because I zone out mostly.

Submitted by: Mass Of Thumbs

Copyright © 2006-2014 Coolnsmart.com - All rights reserved.

Like us!