Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 8

91

You: Do you think I am stupid.
Me: Its not your fault.

Submitted by: aniesha
154

If had a dollar for evry smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.

Submitted by: Ken
19

I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done making this device that lets you punch people in the face over the Internet!

Submitted by: kyliek
43

So did you choose today to humiliate yourself in public?

Submitted by: ohwhatever!
5

A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.

31

Looks are only skin deep but ugly goes right to the bone.

Submitted by: Danielle
52

I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant
19

Person 1: Wow, I can’t play guitar as good as you do.
Person 2: Really?
Person 1: Yes, no matter how hard I try, I always play it better than you.

Submitted by: whitecat
155

That’s a pretty dress…too bad you couldn’t find it in your size.

Submitted by: sslewis
15

I love parents’ way of saying you have got a point “Don’t talk back at me!!”

Submitted by: Clothilda
6

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
Oscar Wilde

25

You: “Are you kidding me?”
Me: “Yes, I’m serious”

Submitted by: Kurt
35

Nice shoes, how long did the doctor say you had to were them?

Submitted by: Jim
6

I won’t say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner.We used to write essays like: What I’m going to be if I grow up.
– Lenny Bruce

55

Oh… Sorry… Did you mistake me for someone who cares?

Submitted by: Munkichikin
14

If I had a dollar for every smart thing you said…wait no, then I’d be in debt!

Submitted by: SarcasticSarcasm=Me
9

Your silence echos your thoughts.

Submitted by: PeteMitt
9

Awkward moment – When your sarcasm is so advanced it makes you look stupid.
I’m sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.

Submitted by: Madison
67

Tact is for people not witty enough to be sarcastic.

Submitted by: Kelley
38

Oh yeah, the louder you yell, the more right you are.
Turn off the lights…you look better that way.

Submitted by: Ishamael
15

Just because people don’t understand you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

Submitted by: livelaff
11

Me: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
You: Aww
Me: Cause your face is seriously messed up!

Submitted by: Alli
12

Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).

Submitted by: sarcasm
31

Tell me what gave you the impression that I actually care, so I can avoid it next time.

Submitted by: N413z
15

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx


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