Alcohol Quotes, Sayings about alcoholic drinks

You know your drunk when you call your friend on your phone and tell him you can’t find your phone.

Submitted by: billy weiher on March 28, 2010

The secret of being honest as an Angel is by being drunk as Hell!!!

Submitted by: Arnold on February 29, 2008

Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems, but then againm neither does milk.

The existence of Beer is proof that God loves us.
– Benjamin Franklin

Submitted by: Scum on January 3, 2008

I mixd whiskey with water and got drunk…
I mixed brandy with water and got drunk…
I mixed scotch with water and got drunk again..
I’ve therefore reached the conclusion that water is bad for me.

Submitted by: kirthi on December 4, 2009

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy.
– Frank Sinatra

Never drink on an empty head

Submitted by: Johnny on September 23, 2007
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My doctor put an insect in a glass of alcohol, it died – He asked me, what do you learn from this???
I replied, “Alcohol kills germs inside the tummy.”

Submitted by: Prashant on January 5, 2010

Why am I so thirsty? when I drank so much last night?

Submitted by: PArtyboi on July 19, 2008

I feel sorry for people who don’t drink, because when they wake up in the morning it is going to be the best feeling they experience the whole day!

Submitted by: Jo on January 16, 2008

Alchohal Brings Out The Inner Retard In All Of Us…

Submitted by: Mariiia' on November 27, 2008

Whiskey and Beer are a man’s worst enemies… But the man that runs away from his enemies is a coward!

Submitted by: Spider-Net on March 20, 2009

Vodka and ice = bad for you liver
Whiskey and ice = bad for your heart
Scotch and ice = bad for your brain
Dammit, the ice ruins everything!

Submitted by: DisGuy on May 26, 2012

When life hands you lemons grab the tequila and salt and call me over!

Submitted by: ?kate on September 11, 2007

I went to bed drunk and happy, I woke up tired and hurting…Obviously sleep is a bad thing.

Submitted by: Evil Bill on January 10, 2010
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I can’t afford vacation, so I am just going to drink until I don’t know where I am.

Drinking and having fun every Saturday and Friday nights is NOT a bad habit,drinking on a Monday morning IS.

Submitted by: Matvei on May 6, 2008

If drinking and driving is illegal…then why do bars have parking lots?

Submitted by: Taty Fiasco on August 19, 2009

The drunk tongue speaks for the sober heart

Submitted by: Flish on December 26, 2008

Officer- “Have you been drinking?”
You- “I’m not as think as you drunk I am.”
Officer- “Son, have you been drinking tonight?”
You- “I swear to drunk I’m not God.”
Officer- “Son, can you answer me?”
You- “What’s the officer, problem?”
Officer- “I’m taking you in for the night.”
You- “I’m sotally tober though.”
Officer- “What’s your name, son?”
You- “Jack Daniels.”

Submitted by: Jack Daniels on November 28, 2010

Good girls are made of sugar and spice…But me and my girls are made outta vodka and ice.

Submitted by: jaz on May 20, 2009

If you want to say the truth and you can’t, DRINK and SAY IT ALL! ;)

Submitted by: Bushra on June 4, 2008

Let’s get drunk, make mistakes & blame it on the alcohol.

Submitted by: dot on October 1, 2010

My idea of a balanced diet is a beer in each hand
keep it on guys ………

Submitted by: sam on February 26, 2008

Life has many choices… Whiskey… Vodka.. Rum.. Gin.. Beer.. Which one did you Choose????

Submitted by: anjan on April 18, 2008
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Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer… I saw the video… we need to talk.

I was so drunk that I fell off the floor.

Submitted by: brendan on January 23, 2008

Tequila… Making ugly men look good since the 16th century.

Submitted by: temp on October 16, 2008

They say so many people die because of alcohol. Perhaps they never realized how many of them are born because of it.

People drink to get rid of the pain they are going through. Some drink and hope when they close their eye that they will never be awake to feel the pain.

Submitted by: Ross on January 8, 2013

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