Alcohol Quotes, Sayings about alcoholic drinks

You know you are drunk when you think the bartender is making your drinks weaker.

Submitted by: Jason on March 23, 2011

The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
– Richard Braunstein

Submitted by: Jerry L. Hilbert on April 11, 2013

Don’t try to drown your sorrows with alcohol, your sorrows can swim.

Submitted by: Casey on March 5, 2009

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
Winston Churchill

I drink to forget, but I can’t remember why.

Submitted by: jason on March 3, 2009

I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.
W.C. Fields

Everything’s better with some wine in the belly.
George R.R. Martin, Game of Thrones


I take my alcohol medicine everyday.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson on May 8, 2014

I feel sorry for people who don’t drink cause I know the only feeling they will have better than me is when they wake up in the morning.

Submitted by: wayne on April 8, 2008

Alcohol is not for sale to under 18 years, they get it free.

Submitted by: Brayo on September 18, 2009

If your drinking to forget than please pay us in advance.

Submitted by: matthew on August 29, 2009

Drink till she looks cute…!!

Submitted by: jack on June 8, 2009

I only drink on three days; Saturdays; Sundays and Weekdays

Submitted by: Prince on October 28, 2009

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend.
– Gerard Way


Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
W.C. Fields

Don’t drink and drive – accidents cause people!

Submitted by: cutiewithabootie on January 8, 2008

There is no such thing as strong drink – only weak men.

Submitted by: Oneel on June 9, 2010

Boy: What is the secret to a long life?
Wise one: The secret to a long life is don’t drink, don’t smoke, and don’t overeat. The secret to a happy life is a whole different story!

Submitted by: lo foxy on November 14, 2011

Alcohol doesn’t solve your problems but then again, neither does milk.

Submitted by: kimchi on August 26, 2009

Don’t Drink And Drive . Give Me The Drink And Drive Me Home

Submitted by: joe on March 21, 2010

Prohibition may be a disputed theory, but none can say that it doesn’t hold water.
– Thomas L. Masson

Better belly burst than good liquor be lost.
Jonathan Swift

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
– Dean Martin

Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed be the facts.
– Finley Peter Dunne


They have warning labels on alcohol for women who are pregnant.. Where is the one that says this bottle could lead you to pregnancy?

Submitted by: Josh on January 19, 2012

A gOOd FrIenD sEes U DruNk aNd TaKeS uR dRiNK aWaY … BUt A tRuE fRiEnD sEes you StUnbLiN nD sAys you bEttEr ChUgg ThAt… YoU kNOw We doNt WaStE!!!!

Submitted by: LADYBIGMOUTH on April 18, 2008

Alcohol is the answer.
What was the question?

Submitted by: Mirjam on March 13, 2010

A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk.
Samuel Johnson

Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.

Submitted by: malcolm burns on May 12, 2013

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