Facebook Status Quotes
Got a problem with me? Solve it. Think i’m trippin? Tie my shoes. Can’t stand me? Sit back down. Can’t face me? Turn around.
Facebook should have a “no one cares” button.
My ex girlfriend’s status said suicidal and standing on the edge. So I poked her.
This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! … Now read without the word dog.
I’d really post your name here every minute if facebook keeps on asking me what’s on my mind.
Delete me , Poke me, Like me, Limit me ..The choice is yours.. Welcome to facebook, where no one is really your friend. =P
If your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single”.
Girl: Why do you constantly keep posting my name as your Facebook status every 2 minutes?
Boy: Facebook keeps asking me what’s on my mind? And honestly, it’s always you.
Roses are red, Facebook is blue, No mutual friends, Who the hell are you?
Being nice to people you don’t like is not being two faced, it is called growing up.
The kids next door challenged me to a water balloon fight. I’m just updating my status while waiting for the water to boil.
…did a lot of nothing yesterday, but I didn’t finish, so I’m going to do it again today!
…It’s Not That I Hate You… But Let’s Put It This Way If You Were On Fire And I Had A Gallon Of Water I’d Drink It.
My greatest fear is that I will accidentally use the status update as the search bar.
Sometimes I wish life was like facebook, you can delete anyone off your page and go back and delete everything you have said and done!
I’d rather check my Facebook than face my check book.
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
- Groucho Marx
I should change my name to No One, that way when I request you as a friend it will say “No One wants to be your friend”.
Adding you as my friend doesn’t mean I like you, I did it just to increase my friend list.
Facebook is like prison, you write on walls and get poked bu people you don’t know.
Single isn’t a status. It’s a word that describes a person who is strong enough to enjoy life without having to depend on someone else.
As Facebook has a “Poke” button, it should have a “Kick” button as well.
Weather forecast for tonight: Dark with a chance of tomorrow in the morning.
No matter what anyone says, my cooking is excellent, even the smoke alarm seems to be cheering me on!
Your intelligence is my common sense.
If the world really ends in 2012, I wasted my whole life in school.
Trust me I am a liar.
Liking your own status is like high fiving yourself in the face.
I’m wondering why logging onto Face book has become part of the everyday routine?… Do I really have nothing better to do!
Who needs TV we got Facebook DRAMA.
Call me anorexic, call me fat. I can put on or I can lose that. Call me annoying, call me dumb. Excuse me miss; but I’m having fun. Call me a flirt, call me fake. That’s just me, so give it a break. Call me weird, a nerd & a geek. Call me what you want, I’m just unique.
Facebook is the only place you can write whatever you feels on a wall.
Grrrr Facebook won’t stop asking what’s on my mind even if I tell it, it keeps on asking.
I know that I am beautiful, looking is enough but staring is too much.
So you’re a player? Nice to meet you, I’m the coach.
My job is definitely secure. No one else wants it.