Facebook Status Quotes

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! … Now read without the word dog.

Submitted by: amal on December 23, 2010

Single is not a status. It is a word that best describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others.

My ex girlfriend’s status said suicidal and standing on the edge. So I poked her.

Submitted by: Wally on December 2, 2013

Got a problem with me? Solve it. Think i’m trippin? Tie my shoes. Can’t stand me? Sit back down. Can’t face me? Turn around.

Submitted by: bailey on May 30, 2012

Facebook should have a “no one cares” button.

Submitted by: joy on October 9, 2013

That awkward moment when you change your Facebook status to ‘single’ and your ex likes it.

Your intelligence is my common sense.

Submitted by: Swapnil on September 16, 2009
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If your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single”.

Submitted by: Ammad mustafa on April 28, 2013

I’d really post your name here every minute if facebook keeps on asking me what’s on my mind.

Submitted by: JABOY on September 10, 2010

Delete me , Poke me, Like me, Limit me ..The choice is yours.. Welcome to facebook, where no one is really your friend. =P

Submitted by: Mister Ann on October 6, 2010

I’m wondering why logging onto Face book has become part of the everyday routine?… Do I really have nothing better to do!

Submitted by: amal on March 12, 2010

I’d rather check my Facebook than face my check book.

Submitted by: Lewis on April 12, 2010

Being nice to people you don’t like is not being two faced, it is called growing up.

Submitted by: Don wood on October 9, 2010

I intend to live forever, or die trying.
Groucho Marx

Submitted by: Wes on April 5, 2010

Weather forecast for tonight: Dark with a chance of tomorrow in the morning.

Submitted by: Mark Redd on March 23, 2010
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The kids next door challenged me to a water balloon fight. I’m just updating my status while waiting for the water to boil.

Submitted by: awesomeee on May 16, 2011

Sometimes I wish life was like facebook, you can delete anyone off your page and go back and delete everything you have said and done!

Submitted by: mimi on December 14, 2010

Trust me I am a liar.

Submitted by: sahil on December 14, 2010

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, No mutual friends, Who the hell are you?

Submitted by: randhir mann on August 28, 2011

…did a lot of nothing yesterday, but I didn’t finish, so I’m going to do it again today!

Submitted by: Frank on January 6, 2011

Girl: Why do you constantly keep posting my name as your Facebook status every 2 minutes?
Boy: Facebook keeps asking me what’s on my mind? And honestly, it’s always you.

Submitted by: petat on September 16, 2011

Got a new job with the local hostage negotiators and tried to phone in sick but they talked me out of it.

Submitted by: amal on March 12, 2010

I’ve officially been diagnosed with OFCD (Obsessive facebook checking disorder). I have also been told that I am beyond cure. Please pray for me.

Submitted by: allisongrace14 on June 8, 2010

Facebook is where hypocrisy, falseness, double standards, rumors and depression meet up for coffee.

Facebook is the only place you can write whatever you feel on a wall.
Grrrr Facebook won’t stop asking what’s on my mind even if I tell it, it keeps on asking.

Submitted by: Ticko Beckford Davis Mwankusye on October 13, 2010
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I’ve gone out to find myself. If I should arrive before I get back, please ask me to wait.

Submitted by: Drew on March 16, 2010

I Know Wat You’re Doing Right Now…
You’re Reading On My Wall, Right !

Submitted by: mark sipot on August 5, 2010

Facebook is like prison, you write on walls and get poked by people you don’t know.

Submitted by: nomalanga sihle qongo on June 10, 2011

Facebook should have an ‘Enemy List’

Submitted by: Cynthia Nadine on May 2, 2011

Adding you as my friend doesn’t mean I like you, I did it just to increase my friend list.

Submitted by: Marvo on November 16, 2011

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