Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor - Page 5

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19

When you’re working in the hive, you have but two choices. To bee, or not to bee.

Submitted by: Paul
11

Being British is about driving a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then traveling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

Submitted by: sofie
11

Having voices in your head is normal. Listening to them, common. Arguing, acceptable. However, when you lose the argument, you’re in trouble.

Submitted by: Adellaide
4

We have fought for our freedom, then we begin to accumulate laws to take it away from ourself.

Submitted by: Mocca, William
7

Indecision may or may not be my problem.
- Jimmy Buffett

Submitted by: Caitlin Malicki
19

Whoever said the pen was mightier than the sword has obviously never met an automatic weapon.
By General Arthur MacDouglas

Submitted by: Guest1
19

Man is the only living being who cuts trees, makes paper, and writes “SAVE TREES” on it.

Submitted by: Sujit
41

You can’t spell families, without “lies”.

Submitted by: Dawn U loverly
43

Some think way too much of their own worth. Just leave them to bask in the delusion of their own reflected glory.

Submitted by: Candice
76

East or West, Home is best
…”I see you’ve not been to North”

Submitted by: nyogz
29

A beautiful night is when you hug your teddy and go to sleep, but a horror night is when your teddy hugs you back!!!! =)

Submitted by: Hira
18

I used to have superpowers… But a therapist took them away.

Submitted by: Bunni
23

87.6% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

Submitted by: Lyle Brewer
21

When you are at the end of your rope…tie a knot and swing :)

Submitted by: Billie Jean
12

Must Do: Make a to- do list

Submitted by: D
8

Optimism has no inhibitions based on past experience.

Submitted by: D
13

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Submitted by: dev
36

Let’s just pretend I’m the Barbie you’ll never get to play with.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully.

Submitted by: XxkeeelyxX
31

There are three kinds of people in this world: Those who can count… And those who can’t.

Submitted by: Willis Wilson
16

You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.
- Albert Einstein

Submitted by: Jake

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