Alcohol Quotes | Witty Quotes on the Joy of Drinking - Page 6

He who drinks gets drunk, he who gets drunk goes to sleep, he who goes to sleeps doesn’t sin, he who doesn’t sin goes to heaven, so lets all drink n we all go to heaven!!! Order from above.

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You drink, get drunk, party hard, get hangover the next morning, then you decide not to drink again, but as your system starts running up and fine, you do it again. That’s how human nature works.

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The first glass is for myself, the second for my friends, the third for good humor, and the forth for my enemies.
– William Temple

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Yea I Have a drinking problem. 2 hands 1 mouth no beer!!!!!!

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It takes skill to be a great drunk, how else can you fall out of a tent and roll around and not spill a single drop of your beer?

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One tequila, two tequila, three thequila FLOOR! Get back up and drink some more!!!

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Drink more beer, give a fat girl a chance.

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I stopped drinking for a while, Then I woke up

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This is one of the disadvantages of wine: it makes a man mistake words for thought.
– Samuel Johnson

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One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.
– Nancy Astor

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An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.
– Dylan Thomas

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They speak of my drinking, but never think of my thirst.

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I like whiskey. I always did, and that is why I never drink it.
– Robert E. Lee

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The drunken man speaks the honest truth.

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Rehab is for Quitters!

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I’ll drink responsibly when there is a brand of vodka named Responsibly.

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Drinking and Driving is so dangerous. Yesterday I hand signaled to turn and some guy stole my beer.

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That’s the problem with drinking if something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.

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I drink to forget I drink.
– Joe E. Lewis

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A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it’s better to be thoroughly sure.

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