Alcohol Quotes, Sayings about alcoholic drinks

If the ocean was vodka and I was a duck I’d swim to the bottom and never come up.
But the ocean’s not vodka and I am not a duck so pass me a bottle and shut the f**k up!

Submitted by: Dr C Glynn on November 27, 2007

A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.

Submitted by: callie on July 8, 2007

I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant on February 23, 2013

My boss didn’t know I drank, till one day I came to work sober.

Submitted by: glenny on November 4, 2007

Of course I am gonna drive. I am too drunk to walk.

Submitted by: anni c on November 15, 2007

Beer is now cheaper than gas, do drink, don’t drive!

Submitted by: FRANCISCO on July 14, 2008

A drunk man never tells a lie.

Submitted by: birdman1109 on February 23, 2008

Whiskey is risky but it makes the girls frisky.
Don’t be dumb and mix wine and rum.
Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before beer, you’re in the clear.
A good friend takes your drink away and says, “You’ve had enough.” But a TRUE friend gives you another drink and yells, “YOU BETTER CHUGG THIS CUZ WE AIN’T TRASHED YET!!”

Submitted by: Sarah on July 26, 2007

I swear to Drunk, I’m not God!

Submitted by: jude on December 2, 2007

I drink to make other people more interesting.
Ernest Hemingway

One tequila
two tequila
three takillya

Submitted by: tipicaly unconcerned on September 1, 2007

Lips that touch liquor touch other lips quicker…

Submitted by: Hardy on February 19, 2008

I only drink on 2 occasions when I’m thirsty and when I’m not

Submitted by: *Kelsey-- on November 5, 2007

Everybody has to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.

Submitted by: Fishfood on July 25, 2007

I realized I was drinking too much,
So I decided to cut down,
I now only drink on days ending in Y

Submitted by: Matrixxx on November 26, 2007

I use to think drinking was bad, so I stop thinking

Submitted by: Albert Quammie on May 9, 2008

Act single, see double, drink triple

Submitted by: tooo young on January 2, 2008

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, coincidence? I think not.

Submitted by: luv2drink on June 30, 2008

I’m on whiskey diet… I’ve lost three days already!

Submitted by: Tania on January 29, 2008

I drink because I work, I work so I can drink.

Submitted by: Danny on February 5, 2008

Money can’t buy you happiness but it can buy you alcohol.

Submitted by: leyton on July 22, 2010

Good friends make the world go round, but good beer makes the room go round.

Submitted by: Sandy on December 6, 2007

I heard this one the other day…
When life gives you lemons make lemonade. Then find someone who’s life gave them vodka, mix them together and have a party!!

Submitted by: Bob on July 22, 2007


Submitted by: Hamata on May 1, 2008

4 beers-20 dollars
2 martini’s 19 dollars
6 jello drops-12 dollars
1 shot of grey goose-6 dollars
taking home 2 hot girls who just drank all of the above:

Submitted by: Dorian on February 25, 2009

Nothing in life is absolute only vodka

Submitted by: Syc1 on February 21, 2008

Don’t cry over spilled milk…it could have been beer!

Submitted by: Lacy on December 29, 2007

When I drink alcohol…everyone says I’m alcoholic but When I drink Fanta…no one says I’m fantastic.

Nothing lasts forever so live it up, drink it down, laugh it off.

Submitted by: Courtney on September 3, 2007

I swear to drunk I’m not god.

Submitted by: mikey on August 11, 2007

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