American author and humor columnist.
Reading… a vacation for the mind…. – Dave Barry
The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery. – Dave Barry
It’s income tax time again, Americans: time to gather up those receipts, get out those tax forms, sharpen up that pencil, and stab yourself in the aorta. – Dave Barry
Have you noticed that whatever sport you’re trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent? – Dave Barry
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. – Dave Barry
What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such a way that any computer, anywhere, that is equipped with a device called a “modem” can make a noise like a duck choking on a kazoo. – Dave Barry
To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent. – Dave Barry
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