People are always asking couples whose marriage has endured at least a quarter of a century for their secret for success. Actually, it is no secret at all. I am a forgiving woman. Long ago, I forgave my husband for not being Paul Newman. – Erma Bombeck
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. – Phyllis Diller
Today I celebrate 14 years of married life. I can’t remember breaking two mirrors.
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend. – Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage means commitment, so does insanity…
A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.
The four most important words in marriage are: “I’ll do the dishes”. Pierre & Marysa
Women marry for prosperity, development and security whereas men marry for enjoyment, destruction and insecurity.
When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the one that’s mad. – Helen Rowland
Why dogs don’t get married? Because they are already leading a dog’s life.
They say marriage is life, they also say life ain’t fair.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake thinking about something you said; after marriage , he’ll fall asleep before you finish saying it. – Helen Rowland
When a man goes down on his knees to ask a women to marry him, and she says yes, he remains on his knees forever.
If marriages are made in heaven… Then it’s obvious that someone up there doesn’t like us.
A woman before marriage is your very best friend, after marriage she’s just a plain old’ dog.
Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.
I now truly believe “happily married” is an oxymoron.
My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was. – Rodney Dangerfield
With my wife I don’t get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to ‘the best woman a man ever had.’ The waiter joined me. – Rodney Dangerfield
Kapil : How is your wife? Shahrukh : An angel from heaven. And yours? Kapil : Still Alive.
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