Clever Quotes and Sayings

Opportunity knocks but once, so be sure and leave a forwarding address.

Submitted by: Quentin D.

Business is the art of extracting money from another man’s pocket without resorting to violence.
– Max Amsterdam

Did you sleep well?
No, I made a couple of mistakes.
Steven Wright

You know that you’ve become wise when your sarcasm is so advanced that people actually think you’re stupid.

Submitted by: Andy Harding

When push comes to shove, I hope you’re standing next to a cliff.

Submitted by: stubsandstubby
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The grass is always greener on the other side when you’re not the one mowing it.

Submitted by: some guy

Light a man a fire and he’ll be warm for the night, light a man on fire and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life

Submitted by: jon

Next time I’m on an elevator with four or more strangers, I’m going to turn around and say, “I’m sure you’re wondering why I’ve gathered you all here.

I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
Why is it that anyone who drives slower than you is an idiot, and anyone who drives faster than you is a maniac?

Submitted by: Elyod Llerret

Copying from a single source is called plagiarism, copying from multiple source is called research.

A person is talented only when he has the talent to express his talent.

Submitted by: Rahul
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You can’t be late until you show up.

I like to spoon after I fork.
– Jarod Kintz

You do not have to prove something for it to be true. However, you do have to prove something for others to believe it to be true.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
&
A garlic a day keeps everyone away!

Submitted by: Rose

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