Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 5
Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go- unless you enjoy them.
How do you expect me to remember your birthday, when you never look any older? Happy birthday!
You think you are special JUST because it’s your birthday today…No way you’re special every day!!!
Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional.
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
~ E. Joseph Cossman
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
- Bob Hope
Happy Birthday. I promise I won’t tell how old you really are!
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
- Samuel Johnson
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
- Billie Burke
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
- Ogden Nash
My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of… Lord- only- knows.
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty.
- Joan Rivers
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
- Bette Midler
One more year of existence down the drain. Happy Birthday!
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
- R. C. Ferguson
If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
- Maurice Chevalier
Age is a number and mine is unlisted.
With age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest people I know.
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
- Father Larry Lorenzoni
Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty- five for years.
- Oscar Wilde
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.