Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Marriage is grand. Divorce, 200 grand.

Submitted by: Mariano Munoz

The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.

Submitted by: Leo

There are two sides in a marriage, one who is always right and the other is called…..the husband.

Submitted by: shirley

You have got to get married you just can’t go through life enjoying yourself.

Submitted by: George Valentine

Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!

Submitted by: Ralph ABK6

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
Groucho Marx

Marriage is far more complicated than quantum physics.

Submitted by: William Mocca

Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.

Submitted by: yuri

I love her even though she makes me do stuff.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson

Marriage: I think my wife fell in love with annoying me.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson

Marriage is like a jacuzzi, it’s hot until you get used to it.

Submitted by: Just a girl

I married Miss Right. Didn’t know her first name was Always.

Submitted by: tushar

For happy married life men must remember: when you are wrong confess immediately, when right keep mum.

Submitted by: Santosh Jindal

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.
– Billy Connolly

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