Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty. – Joan Rivers
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. – Erma Bombeck
The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet. – Robert Orben
Birthdays are God’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese. – Billie Burke
What goes up but never comes down? Your age.
My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of… Lord- only- knows.
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
You would have loved the gift I didn’t bother getting you.
Happy Birthday. I promise I won’t tell how old you really are!
I’m not saying you’re old. Oh wait. You are!
It’s better to be over the hill than to buried under it.
Birthdays – Too young to forget them and too old to care.
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own. – Bette Midler
Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
You’re how old? Just be glad your age is not calculated in “Dog years”. They would have put you down by now!
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
Say goodbye to the flirty 30’s and bring on the naughty 40’s.
You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
Every year on your birthday, be nice to your kids. The older you get the closer it comes for them to choose a nursing home.
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