Facebook Status Quotes - Page 5

Sean is going to drink wet cement and get really stoned.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we’re all right now.

Jolene understands that hard work has a future payoff but Laziness pays off now.

I said “no” to drugs, but they just wouldn’t listen.

I’m going on a date with my pillow!! Goodnight!!:)

Submitted by: Rache

When you can’t sleep- have no fear! Facebook is here! …Yay?

Submitted by: Katie :)

I know that I am beautiful, looking is enough but staring is too much.

Submitted by: FRANCIA JORDAN

Facebook should have a limit on times you can change your relationship status… After 3 it should default to “unstable”.

Submitted by: Hussein

James is going to borrow money from a pessimist. They don’t expect to be paid back.

You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.

Sara couldn’t myself have better it said.

I log out from FB. Reason: I am bored.
After 5 min I signed in. Reason: I am bored.

School is pointless. English: We speak it. History: They’re dead, get over it. Math: We have calculators. Spanish: We have Dora.

Submitted by: kylei

On Facebook there should be a relationship status that says I don’t even know what’s going on?

Submitted by: Jess

Steven is not for everyone. Clinical tests show that Steven may cause nausea, fatigue, and kidney or liver problems. Ask your doctor if Steven is right for you.

Josh thinks that if your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” that you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single”

“My memory is so bad” “How bad is it” “How bad is what?”

Submitted by: Brighton Zephania

James is for external use only. See your doctor before administering.

If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up remember…You can always change your birthday on Facebook!

Facebook Status Quote: If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten,...

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They said 2- faced is a norm in society.Okay..But if you’re going to be 2- faced,make one of them pretty at least.
Please don’t be 2- faced with me, because it’s hard to decide which face to slap first…

Submitted by: Rabia

If you’re going to spread lies and rumors about me on Facebook… Feel free to tag me.;)

Submitted by: Ryan Harrison

I just edited my friend list. So if you’re still able to read this then congratulations you made it through my first elimination.

Submitted by: bobby

Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.

Jessie took the “Are you spending too much time on Facebook” quiz and the result is “No – You should spend much more time”. Jessie shot the computer.

In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That’ll teach ’em not to f*** with you.


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