Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings
9 more hours and I can start behaving normally again.
Well aren’t you just a ray of sunshine.
Have you heard about the discount for deodorant from Nivea?
So I Burnt My Hand The Other Day.
Then Someone Asks Me:
You – “Did That Hurt??”
Me – “No! I Just Yelled Out In Pain To Annoy Everyone!”
Excuse me, and pardon my interruption, but would you mind considering helping me to find out what makes you so repulsive!
Sarcasm is my mother tongue.
You: May I see the salt please
Me: See it
I just got off the phone with Satan…he told me that he has a special seat in hell with your name on it.
Abusive Mom: Do you hate me?
Girl: No, I just wish you would get your next period in a shark tank
Abusive Dad: Do you hate me?
Girl: No, it’s just that if you were on fire I’d roast marshmallows.
What do you do when life gives you lemons? Well, when life gives me lemons, I sit in front of a McDonald’s and throw them at pedestrians.
Guy: Hey don’t worry I can play dumb
Woman: Play dumb? You could manage the team!
Oh yea you look so pretty I can’t take it.
If you had to choose a name for my dog! It would for sure be yours! For loyalty purposes.:)
Would you care to join me?
Why, are you coming apart?
I wasn’t trying to insult you!! I’m just being sarcastic.
Person 1: Have you heard the news?
Person 2: No, but I will if you tell me.
You might appear to be hard on people, but I know that deep inside there beats a heart of solid concrete.
Person: Yeah that’s so funny.
You: Yeah that’s why everyone is laughing.
Me: Hey guess what I just found out!
Black guy: What?
Me: I know a black guy!
Black guy: Me too!
You have one foot in your mouth already. You should probably try for a second.
Sarcasm is anger’s evil cousin.
– Anger Management
Away is where you should go.
Oooohhh…soooo sorry..you must be mistaking me for someone who cares…
So, this is where our diligence has led?
Since you’re so great, I might as well ask for advice.