Alcohol Quotes, Sayings about alcoholic drinks - Page 7

I have come to the conclusion that the solution to all of life’s problems can’t be found at the bottom of a beer glass. However, I’m going to keep checking just in case I’m wrong.

Submitted by: Jeffro

Beer makes you feel the way you should feel without beer.

Submitted by: Donnie Morris

I don’t get drunk, I get AWESOME!!

Submitted by: Bo Urbon

If drinking and driving is against the law, why do they have parking at clubs and pubs?

Submitted by: Teogo

When you’re drunk, you notice the Earth really spins.

Submitted by: Jack Daniels

Officer- “Have you been drinking?”
You- “I’m not as think as you drunk I am.”
Officer- “Son, have you been drinking tonight?”
You- “I swear to drunk I’m not God.”
Officer- “Son, can you answer me?”
You- “What’s the officer, problem?”
Officer- “I’m taking you in for the night.”
You- “I’m sotally tober though.”
Officer- “What’s your name, son?”
You- “Jack Daniels.”

Submitted by: Jack Daniels

I am awake, I might as well be drinking.

Submitted by: ali

They advise me not to drink every day, so I just do it every night.

Submitted by: Alan

I never drink unless I’m alone or with somebody.

Submitted by: Murfius

What’s the ociffer problem

Submitted by: nick lawson

I drink to forget that I smoke.

Submitted by: shreyansh rohatgi

Friends don’t let friends drink by themselves.

Submitted by: Barrett

2 beers 1 mouth, Bring out the funnel.

Submitted by: Seven

Let’s get drunk, make mistakes & blame it on the alcohol.

Submitted by: dot

No one respects age unless it’s bottled.

Submitted by: Gary

Alcohol is not the answer to every question…
but it helps us to forget every question…

Submitted by: Shifo

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes & dreams. If I didn’t drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, ‘It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than to be selfish and worry about my liver.’
– Jack Handey

Submitted by: JenJen

Rehab is for Quitters!

Submitted by: JenJen

Who says I drink.. I am just helping poor people working in alcohol factories.

Submitted by: abhay bhandari

I drink for those who wish me well; All those who don’t can go to hell…

Submitted by: Marie Antoinette

I don’t have a drinking problem, it’s you who have a problem with my drinking.

Submitted by: Daniel

Reality is an illusion caused by alcohol deficiency!

Submitted by: Mithil Khanolkar

If your date ain’t what you expected, drink till she is!!

Submitted by: Pouri Camz

Happy hour is any hour with vodka.

Submitted by: jesseyeca

I am not drunk, I’m just chemically off- balanced…

Submitted by: yusufali

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