Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor - Page 7

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If life gives you lemons. Eat carrots.

Submitted by: Naila Boo

Let’s agree that some days we are the pain and some days the a**!

Submitted by: succor146

Canada gave America Justin Bieber. America gave Canada the first nuclear wasteland.

Submitted by: Ali D.

Save the world. Destroy humans.

Submitted by: christina

He was a modest man, with much to be modest about.

Submitted by: Gary

I’m sorry, did that hurt? I thought that there was a gnat on your cheek.

Submitted by: IAmunknown

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.
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Witty Quote: For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after...

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Person 1: That lady looks really interesting.
Person 2: She looks like her daddy.

Submitted by: IAmunknown

I was once told I can do anything as long as I believe in myself.
I wanted to fly so I jumped off a building…. It didn’t work.

Submitted by: H.E.T

Dont love the one you love cause they may not love you in return , but love the one who loves you cause her heart is in your hands

Submitted by: better not told

Come to think of it, when *isn’t* it a good idea to go limp and play dead???

Submitted by: John Alejandro King

Statistics are overrated…
20% of people know that!

Submitted by: LovingKing

Some think way too much of their own worth. Just leave them to bask in the delusion of their own reflected glory.

Submitted by: Candice

I’m not superstitious, just stitious.
– Michael Scott

Submitted by: Brenna

A good man is hard to find, but a hard man is better!

Submitted by: Tammy

The grass may be greener on the other side…but someone has to mow it!

Submitted by: Mel

Procrastination? what does that word even mean anyways? I’ll look it up tomorrow.

Submitted by: chris harder

Wisdom rules untill force goes crazy.

Submitted by: krinolina

If my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.

Submitted by: Keith

I can’t walk a mile in your shoes. They’re too small.

Submitted by: Dahlia v.

They say you should never look back, so I focused on what was in front of me. Little did I know… A car was coming…

Submitted by: robin

East or West, Home is best
…”I see you’ve not been to North”

Submitted by: nyogz

My Friend doesn’t want Monday to come. I was thinking I could put the word out and see if any of the other days might do a double…Sunday, you Free?

Submitted by: Deb Henry

Department of redundancy department.

Submitted by: Gary

It never rains on a dry day.

Submitted by: Tom

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