I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger… Then it hit me.
Stupid is when you spend 18 hours trying to drown a fish.
I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. – Steven Wright
I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.
Have you ever wondered why you can’t taste your tongue?
I never apologise. I’m sorry, that’s just the way I am.
The following statement is true. The previous statement is false.
My imaginary friend thinks you have some serious problems.
Calling someone stupid doesn’t make you any smarter.
I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out.
I wonder if people wonder what I wonder, because I wonder what people wonder. Do YOU wonder what I wonder? Now THAT is what I wonder. I wonder what you’re wondering as you wonder what I wonder, if of course you’re even wondering what I’m wondering… I wonder..
I don’t follow my dreams…I ask them where they are going and find them later!
Boys are like lava lamps…fun to look at but not very bright.
You know you’re stupid when you wake someone up by asking if they’re asleep.
You laugh because imm different,i laugh because I just farted..
I asked Mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn’t have paid for me.
Go for the happy endings, because life doesn’t have any sequels. If you keep chasing yesterday, you’re going to miss tomorrow.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. – Steven Wright
The person who laughs last at a joke..didn’t get it
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. – George Carlin
If you ever decide to leave me, I’m going with you.
Crazy? I was crazy once, I had my own padded room. Then the worms came…Worms? I hate worms, they drive me crazy! Crazy? I was crazy once…
Second is the first loser.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
If you don’t know what you are talking about, at least act like you do.
Everybody has a photographic memory. Some people just don’t have film.
You can lie to me, You can lie to the court, hell… You can even lie in front of my car!
I don’t suffer from insanity… I enjoy every minute of it!
Put your seatbelt on guys, I wanna try something.
When butterflies fall in love do they feel humans in their stomachs.
Im not stupid I just lack common sense
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent
“when someone calls you stupid, you arent really stupid, they are just jealous unsmart people have more fun!!”
Me? Fail English!? … That’s unpossible!
I once thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken.
Don’t hate me cause i’m beautiful!! Hate me cause your man thinks soo!!
OH MY GOD!! The rain’s wet!!!
A cheerleader is a dancer gone retarded. ^^
You’re playing stupid again.. Looks like you’re winning too.
The strawberry shampoo doesnt taste as good as it smells.
Some people are pretty, and some people are stupid, but the majority of people are pretty stupid..
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, I snapped a tooth eating it so I had to see a dentist instead.
– Everything is the same… Only different. – Smell the color nine. – Don’t look at me in that tone of voice! – Just because I’m stupid doesn’t mean I’m dumb.
I ate my homework cos my teacher said it was a piece of cake. – she lied
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do will be misinterpreted and then used against you in the court of law.
Think smarter, not harder=]
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like clearing the driveway before it stops snowing. ]
I used to think I was stupid, then I met you…
God must love stupid people. He has so many!!
If someone asks “Do I look that stupid”. Then it’s better not to answer.:)
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