Funny Men Quotes and Sayings

11

You know… There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!!!
- Bill Maher

Funny Men Quotes Quote: You know… There is a name for...

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11

The man is not a dog – he will not run after bones.

Submitted by: mareniek
11

Things you’ll never hear a man say…

Funny Men Quotes Quote: Things you’ll never hear a man say…

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3

Husbands are like fine wine. They take time to mature.
- Letters to Juliet, the movie.

Submitted by: brooklynne
13

A women needs a man like fish need a bicycle.

Submitted by: Sonia
27

A man is always ready to go, it’s a women that says whether yes or no!

Submitted by: Peter
7

Men…. I don’t get them, they spend 9 months of their life waiting to come out and the rest of their life trying to get in.

Submitted by: Lynn
5

We can train a monkey to fly a jet but we can’t train a man to be humble.

Submitted by: C Ray
13

Women fake orgasms and men fake finances.
- Suze Orman

12

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus; ex’s are from Uranus.

Submitted by: Doug Dunn
2

He suffers from delusions of grandeur; nevertheless he is truly grand!

Submitted by: Boghos L. Artinian
8

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it’s quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.
- Rita Rudner

5

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
- Rita Rudner

10

Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
- Groucho Marx

7

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
- Groucho Marx

12

Men are like toilets; deep, dark and full of sh**!

Submitted by: Amy
6

All men are dogs, the difference is the barking rate!

Submitted by: vanne$$a
6

Men don’t take direction very well. But eventually when they realize the direction was correct they take all the credit.

Submitted by: Hunter
7

Dogs should not be compared to men, they are much better.

Submitted by: Rachel
8

If human beings originated from monkeys, why do men act like dogs???

Submitted by: Jay Holmes Jr.
14

Men are like purses. Cute, full of sh*t and replaceable.:)
Men are stupid, if you forget this just give it a min, they’ll remind you again.

Submitted by: Amy
14

Q: Why is it so hard to find a man that’s caring, considerate, and nice?
A: Because he already has a boyfriend.

Submitted by: Beth
9

All men are dogs. It’s just that some make better pets!

Submitted by: Bob
10

Behind every successful man there’s a woman, behind every unsuccessful man there are several women.

Submitted by: Valerie. Tan burden
3

Men are like blenders. You know you need one, but you’re not sure why.

Submitted by: Paula

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