Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 3

Person 1: What do you think we should make for dinner?
Person 2: Food.

Submitted by: Iamunknown

Person 1: Did you fall?
Person 2: No, a bunch a kids wanted to play ping pong with my a**.

Submitted by: IAmunknown

Sorry, my fist meant to caress your face.

Submitted by: Iamunknown

You: Go to hell.
Me: I go on vacations there.

Submitted by: Vuyie

I became so religious so that I could pray for you to burn in hell.

Submitted by: Vuyie

My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.

Submitted by: dave title

How very observant of you there captain obvious.

Submitted by: Lima Tiapula

I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant

A guy asks “Do you think I’m straight?”
My response: You’re as straight as a circle.

Submitted by: Aj

3 A. M. Phone call
– Hey are you asleep?
– No, I was in coma thank you for rescuing me!

Submitted by: Jox_Touchdown
Copyright © 2006-2015 - Sayings and Quotes - All rights reserved.