Short Funny Quotes - Page 20

100

Was it a car or a cat I saw?
Read it backwards.

Submitted by: Desirae
41

As long as the house is on fire, let us warm ourselves.

Submitted by: Kristy Sommars
7

One thing wrong with common sense, it’s not very common anymore.

Submitted by: Cofussion
17

Save the planet. It’s the only one with cute boys.

Submitted by: gg
10

My curiosity didn’t kill the cat but it surely scared the hell out of it.

Submitted by: neon
15

Sometimes I play a game with my friends called “Staying Away”.

Submitted by: onlykylsen3kings
8

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said “Parking Fine”.

Submitted by: Pseudonym
12

She got her good looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
- Groucho Marx

Submitted by: Cheynaa.
10

When in doubt make something up so you don’t look like a fool.

Submitted by: lele
27

Vegetarian don’t kill the animals for eating; they eat the animals’ food.

Submitted by: toba
13

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

Submitted by: David lynch
13

I’m not laughing because you’re my brother, I’m laughing because there’s nothing you can do about it.

Submitted by: sam
25

Don’t give the man a fish ….you eat it.

Submitted by: sam
6

I forgive and forget, because I have a good heart, and a terrible memory.
Funny Quote: I forgive and forget, because I have...

Embed Code
Submitted by: Kuzai
30

If someone says that you drawing looks ugly, say I didn’t mean to draw you.

Submitted by: Andeo
19

Life is too short to remove the USB device safely.

Submitted by: joanne
11

I’m not crazy. Just imaginative.

Submitted by: Justme
20

Don’t try to make a pig sing, It only frustrates you and annoys the pig!

Submitted by: mimi w.
38

Boy: Hi
Girl: Hi
Boy: I like someone..
Girl: Who?!!
Boy: She looks just like you…
Girl: OMG! You like me? I like you too…
Boy: Oh no. I like your..sister

Submitted by: Tikitiki
12

If the customer is always right, then why isn’t anything for free?

Submitted by: Kenny
13

Whatever it is – I didn’t do it!

Submitted by: liz
15

Chocolate is the answer, who cares what the question is.

Submitted by: vincent king
10

If you don’t like my driving, get off the sidewalk.
The more I think, the more I get confused.

Submitted by: Corny
15

You say ear wax, I say melting brain.

Submitted by: Sneaky
11

Weather forecast for tonight: dark

Submitted by: mackeeenzzie!

Copyright © 2006-2014 Coolnsmart.com - All rights reserved.

Like us!