Short Funny Quotes - Page 3

125

To learn you must make mistakes; when you make a mistake you often will get in trouble. So then why do teachers punish you when you get into trouble if you are only learning, which is exactly what they want you to do?

Submitted by: J-Dog
300

I want to kill the hottest person alive… But suicide is a crime!

Submitted by: cassie
29

If karma doesn’t come around and hit you in the face, I will.

Submitted by: Jilll
54

Dear maths…!! Please grow up and solve your problems yourself!!!

Funny Quote: Dear maths…!! Please grow up and solve...

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Submitted by: dear maths!!!
53

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

Submitted by: ~Joy96~
49

The hardest part about business is minding your own.

Submitted by: jay
19

Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork.

Submitted by: Lindsey
14

Dear optimist, pessimist, and realist, while you guys were arguing about the glass of water, I drank it.

Sincerely, the opportunist.

Submitted by: Mark Cromo
77

Why is the slowest traffic of the day called “rush hour”?

Submitted by: Kim
287

Never judge someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. By that time, they’ll be a mile away and barefoot.

Submitted by: Julio
243

I’m an excellent housekeeper..Every time I get divorce I keep the house ;- )

Submitted by: ArmenianGrl
38

Would a fly without wings be called a walk.

Submitted by: blazinherb420
409

Why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?

Submitted by: tara:littlestar
38

If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still in the pot!

Submitted by: Saadi
95

Everyone has the right to their own opinion… Yours is just wrong.

Submitted by: Beth
115

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W.C. Fields

Submitted by: mina
67

A picture is worth a thousand words, but only if you know that many.

Submitted by: katie
10

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
George Carlin

42

If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving is not for you.

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Submitted by: Adrian
219

My mind is like lighting, one brilliant flash, then its gone…:(

Submitted by: Carnivorus Sheep
48

L.O.L has gone from meaning laugh out loud to I have nothing else to say.
Pandas are the least racist..they’re black, white, and Asian
Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver, blue, purple, orange and all those other colors now.
I’m afraid of my mailman……..he knows where I live!!

Submitted by: SUmmy
76

Don’t follow my footsteps I run into walls!

Submitted by: Laura
13

If you must lie, be brief.

Submitted by: Darby Gloria
76

Never apologize for saying what you feel cos its apologizing for being real.

Submitted by: bonche
2

I hate how after an argument I think of more clever things I should have said.

Funny Quote: I hate how after an argument I...

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